Knuckle Up Chump. Writing is a Deathmatch #MondayBlogs

I’ve said it before, I’ll probably say it a million more damn times. Writing ain’t easy. And when I say that, I don’t mean writing 80,000 words of coherent story. Don’t even get me started on the countless hours of editing. The soul crushingness of beta readers and further editing. Not to mention the sore throat from reading the entire novel out loud.

I suppose it could end there, but after you’ve written and edited a novel, you probably want to sell it, right? And when I say writing ain’t easy, I’m still not talking about the fight to craft the perfect fucking query letter. Is this concise? Does it convey the right tension? Do I include previous works? What if they didn’t sell well? Should I tell the agent about my overwhelming fear of praying mantises (Manti?)?

After that there’s the always smooth sailing of rejections. Form letter after form letter after slightly personalized form letter, the highlight of the rejection process. But hey, even J.K. Rowling got rejected, right? So you keep plugging ahead. Eventually move from agents to small presses. That shouldn’t be as strict and then you find one and discover that you should have been building yours social network months ago.

It goes on and on. The struggle for sales is real. What about this technique? How about this marketing service? There are probably a million different questions and ten million different answers. And every last one of them leads to work. How much work you put in can decide how successful you will be.

A friend sent me something to the extent of this: Only 5% of people start a book. Of them, only 5% finish the first draft. Of those only 5% have the tenacity to stick through edits. 5% through queries and so it goes. On and on. So do you have what it takes to be in the 5% of the 5% of the 5% of the 5% or whatever? Yes, good. Write a novel and sell some goddamn books. If the answer is no, that’s not a bad thing. Maybe you just really enjoy writing books.

To be honest, I’m at a bit of an impasse. I started writing books because I love it. I started selling books because I’m a narcissist who needs constant approval. Now, I’ve got 4 novels out there that, quite frankly, aren’t selling worth a damn. Recently, I’ve signed up with a book marketing badass (C.D. Taylor) and she has given me a ton of instruction (Read: Work) to market myself. If I follow every bit of direction I’ve been giving, I will surely sell more books, but I will also not have any time to write any more books if I follow all of the instructions. Selling books means a lot to me, but so does writing them. I’ve got a decision to make about how hard I’m willing to work to be successful. So do you. Life is all about finding a balance, my friends. Sometimes that comes natural and sometimes you have to work for it, but whatever you do, never assume writing is easy and know that it doesn’t stop as soon as you get words on the page.


Whiskey & Wasted Words Episode #1

Hey all, Prose Bro Chris Smith and I have started our very own podcast. And I’m so excited I want to share it with y’all. So I think I’m going to embed it.

Right here:

And if that’s not good enough, here a link to just download the whole damn she-bang:

There are probably a million people I need to thank, but I’m blanking right now. For sure these two though:

We owe thanks to @EveyJacob on Twitter for sending in the icebreaker question and my friend Chris Suggs for donating some great music for our theme. You can find more of his works at

SO tune in and listen to Chris and I babble about music and writing and why we are completely unqualified to give advice.

W is for Whiskey #AtoZChallenge

ImageAlmost there, only three more posts after this one and for some reason I swear it’s getting harder to come up with things the closer I get to the end of the alphabet…Anyway, today is W and in my book W stands for whiskey.

Every writers’ favorite muse, right? Eh, probably not anymore, it seems like I see more writers talking about their coffee fix than their alcohol fix. Me? I’m a little bit of both, I’d say I enjoy ten cups of coffee a week and three alcoholic beverages a week (W can also stand for wine you know).

I’d say whiskey is my favorite alcohol of them all though. Not so much straight, I’m kind of a wuss like that. Whiskey sour is my go-to drink, but I’ve recently started making Tom Collins’ (I guess that’s how you spell that) with whiskey instead of vodka or gin and it’s delicious.

This inspires me, I guess. Maybe I just really wanted to write about whiskey. I’m not sure anymore. Well, it’s already done now. I’m not changing it. I guess this is where I close. My top three would probably be a good way to end this article. Sound good to you? If not I guess you could just stop reading and call this the end right now.


Still there? Okay my top three whiskeys:

1. Crown Royal

2. Jameson Special Reserve

3. Macallan’s 10 (I haven’t tried anything older, can’t afford it at the moment, but this is the favorite drink of the character Ty Burdin in my new novel)

Well, that’s that. Have a g’day folks.